The Night Don't Last Forever
by ApolloGoGo
Summary: Ferg starts a new job at a strip club. He meets a coworker and starts to fall in love. He convinces himself the other man is married and that he wouldn't have a chance despite everything.
1. Chapter 1

Fergal Devitt had been in New Orleans for a few days. He needed time away from the small town feel of Bray. He wanted to just live a little looser, live without feeling like he was under the thumb of every good Catholic family in Ireland. He looked out of his hotel window at the city below him. It was remarkable how during the day it was so peaceful and historic, then transformed into something wild at night. He turned back to his room and started to put the clothing he had laid out on. He got himself together to go to what he assumed was a pool hall. He never looked more into what exactly "The Corner Pocket" had to offer but with a name like that it had to be a billiards reference. He left his room and walked the few blocks from his hotel to bar.

Fergal walked in and was taken aback. There were scantily clad men dancing on the bar. He had never seen anything like this in Bray. Not that Bray was backward but more because there was still a bit of conservatism. The men all looked like they were getting tipped well. He was eventually going to need to make money if he planned to be here for a few months. He looked at a bulletin with some interest cards. He filled one out and slid it into the box marked "Applications." He had no idea how any of this worked. How he was even supposed to dance.

Fergal turned back to the men on the bar. One caught his eye. He stepped closer to the attractive dancer. Not that he could ever speak to a man so beautiful, he had a deep interest in what he was doing. He was tan, tall, lean, brown eyes, dirty blond hair. He looked down at Fergal from his spot on the bar. He didn't break his eye contact with Fergal. He continued dancing for men giving him money. Fergal retreated. He felt like he already owed this man more than money for staring in such lust. He went to a corner. It was typical of him to kind of hide from confrontation. He never knew how he'd even ask how to become a dancer. He was enjoying the music in the corner he was in when he felt someone behind him. He felt hot breath on his ear.

"I saw ya fill out the little interest card. To dance?"

"Yes."

"Good. I'm in charge of hiring dancers." He got closer "Ya've got some beautiful blue eyes."

"Thanks."

"What's your name handsome?"

"It's um, it's Fergal."

"Nice Irish name for a nice Irish stud. I'm Lucas."

"Nice biblical name."

"About the only thing biblical about me, darlin'." Lucas smiled at the sound that escaped Fergal's mouth. "Ya seemed a bit interested but ran off?"

"Sorry, I didn't want to come off perverted, I was interested in the dancing."

"Ah. Ya'd make a lot of money doing it. Ya look well built under that black button up. I could teach you." Fergal just nodded at him. Lucas slid a piece of paper into Fergal's pants pocket. "Alright. That ass is going to make you some cash too."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's a good ass. You'll get tips from older men. If you let em have a nice little feel, they will tip more."

Lucas's hands felt around Fergal's ass. He closed his eyes. He'd promised himself this was going to be professional. His breath hitched when Fergal turned around to face him. He had the most beautiful blue eyes. He knew he shouldn't have followed Fergal after seeing him drop the interest card into the little box on the wall. The number one rule was never show interest in a customer. You don't make tips falling in love or lust with the first handsome man who stares at you with the level of intensity that Fergal had. His eyes shifted to the wall. Fergal may have very well been his next co-worker. He needed to be a little more professional. Part of him was glad he slid his jeans back on over his little briefs. Working with this man was going to be hard in any capacity.

Fergal realized he was standing too close. He had a bad habit of getting too close when he was talking to people. It was an even worse habit when it was someone that he wanted to get to know better. He knew at times it made people uncomfortable but it was a horrible habit. He wasn't expecting the extremely attractive Go Go boy to be the one to offer to teach him the trade. He didn't expect his future employment to be in the hands of someone he was eye fucking. He assumed it would be some older unattractive man, maybe someone a little seedy. He definitely wasn't expecting it to be someone whose cock he watched with lust a few minutes ago. He started questions whether this was a terrible idea or not. On one hand he would eventually run out of money. He needed to live, he needed to eat. On the other hand, he had a significant amount of money between the two accounts he had. He nodded when Lucas excused himself. He felt some form of relief. He left the bar with the assumption Lucas was done for the evening. He needed to go back to the room he was renting to take care of something.

Lucas walked to the room where all the dancers changed into their small underpants. He sat on the floor with his back up against the cold wall. He needed to cool down. His mind was filled with nasty thoughts of Fergal. He just imagined him moaning out his name while he was getting fucked. He looked like he could handle getting dicked hard, really seemed like he preferred it. The thought of those pretty blue eyes looking up at him from his knees didn't help ease his hardening dick. He couldn't go out there and dance like this. He walked into the private shower area for the dancers. With a few quick strokes and the image of Fergal's eyes staring up at him sucking him off, he was able to stabilize his hormones. He cleaned himself up and took a few calming breaths to get his mind back on his job. He stepped out to the bar in a pair of spandex briefs with the Union Jack on the ass. He took his spot on the bar. He scanned the room for Fergal. He seemed to have left for the night.


	2. Chapter 2

Fergal sat at the desk in his hotel room. He needed to get his shit together and call Lucas. He told him they'd meet two days ago but he kept putting it off. He took a deep breath. He picked up his phone and started to formulate a text. He needed to figure out his excuse for avoiding all of this. Maybe he'd tell him he was looking for more permanent housing. He couldn't live in a hotel room forever. He figured out his text and sent it to the number on the card.

 **Unknown:** Hello, it's Fergal.

 **Lucas:** Hey! I was waiting. Thought you got shy.

 **Fergie:** Oh no, I had a couple things come up.

 **Lucas:** Sounds spicy. Do you own a pair of briefs?

 **Fergie:** I have a few of the spandex type.

 **Lucas:** Bring a pair.

Fergal grabbed a pair of small black shorts and put them in his duffle bag. He grabbed some other odds and ends things he thought he might need. He had no real idea of what he was getting himself into. Sure, he liked the idea of being a go-go boy, but he only really was interested because Lucas caught his eye. He looked at his surroundings, he needed the job, he couldn't live in a hotel, he needed an actual address. He looked at the address Lucas sent him. He didn't live too far. He could walk there, save bus fare. He had some apprehension going to this man's home. He literally met him in a bar. Knew none of his interests. Didn't know anything outside of him dancing on top of a bar in small blue briefs. He watched where he was walking a bit carefully when he realized he was on the street. For someone who danced for dollars he had a lovely home. Maybe he had a sugar daddy? He did say older men liked when they could touch a little. Hell, maybe he was married. He knocked with a little hesitation and an older woman answered. Ah, he had a sugar mama. He wasn't gay. Of course he wasn't, why would he have been? Fergal really did well picking men to become infatuated with.

"Good afternoon." She must've came over with him from England.

"Good afternoon. Yes well, I'm here to see Lucas." She smiled.

"He's on the phone right now with a student, but you're welcome to come in and have a seat. Can I get ya a cup of tea?"

"Oh, sure, thank you. These are lovely plants."

"Bromeliads. Resilient plants." She gave a weak smile. "I'll be back with that tea."

Fergal sat down and observed his surroundings. He felt like he was in Jay Gatsby's mansion. The furniture and décor had an art deco feel to it. He wasn't sure if it was Lucas's style so much as it was his sugar mama's. He saw Lucas emerging from the hallway. He was in a pair of gray slacks, a white button up, and a nice navy cardigan. He had a pair of black framed Armani glasses. It was strikingly different than he'd seen him the night before. Fergal was dressed similar but more so that he wouldn't have drawn attention to himself. He opted for khakis, a white tee, and a gray cardigan. Lucas smiled at him.

"I hope you don't mind Early Grey. I'm going to have to go to the market and get some more tea."

"My name is Fergal by the way. I hadn't introduced myself."

"Oh, no worry, I'm Maggie." She looked at the taller man. "Did ya want a cup too Luke?"

"No, I have some in the office. I used the last of Darjeeling."

"Oh alright. Well, I'm going to run and pick up something to make for dinner. Fergal will you be staying?"

"I hadn't…"

"He will."

"Lovely."

Lucas motioned for Fergal to bring the tea and himself down the hall. He looked at some photos he passed. Lucas and Maggie were in seemingly none of them, at least not together. Maybe they didn't want to make their relationship obvious. Fergal stepped into an office with Lucas. Ah, there was a photo of the two of them on his desk. He had a mess of paperwork. They sat in silence until he cleared up the mess. Fergal sighed at the level of care Lucas had when moving the frame containing him and Maggie. Lucas looked around the room before silently telling Fergal to follow him. They passed a bedroom with another photo of Lucas and Maggie. They went into a basement dance studio. There was a black and white picture hanging of a beautiful dancer. Fergal felt someone behind him.

"Go gear up." He turned to Lucas in a pair of white briefs. They had a Union Jack on the back and the initials ZSJ on the front. Fergal was confused.

"Alright. What, um, what do those initials mean?"

"I don't dance under my legal name. Zack Sabre Jr."

"Is that common?"

"Yeah. We'll find ya a nice name. Just go gear up."

Fergal walked into a small changing room. There were more black and whites of the woman. One of her very pregnant in pointe shoes. He wondered who she was. Where was the baby? He looked out at Lucas stretching while talking with Maggie. He was a bit jealous. She was terribly beautiful. He could tell she was older, probably in her 60s, maybe 70s. She aged well regardless.

Lucas looked up at the older woman from his position on the floor. Lucas looked at her, she still had such sadness in her eyes. He knew she hated that he was still dancing. She just wanted him to teach and move forward. They were well beyond the point of still needing the money. Still, Lucas wanted to continue a certain lifestyle. One that she was used to. She deserved everything. She was his world.

"I wish ya didn't have to run around in your underpants." She frowned. "I wish you stopped when the funeral was paid off."

"Ya tell me all the time but I want to spoil ya the same way he did." Lucas made sure Fergal couldn't hear him. "Plus, have ya seen my new friend."

"He's a handsome boy. Hopefully it leads…"

Lucas and Maggie turned to the door. Fergal looked at her. He noticed little things about her that he imagined would attract a man. Her hair was well kept, it was still long, but silver replaced whatever color it was. Her eyes were a beautiful green color. And her smile was breathtaking. He was curious about her age but he'd never ask.

Lucas turned on the floor and looked up at Fergal in a pair of black shorts. He had about 80 abs and the outline of his cock was apparently. Lucas swallowed a lump and repeated to be professional in his head but his eyes ignored his brain. He felt Maggie's hand on his shoulder. It brought him back to reality.

"I'm going to go start on the food. I'm making roast chicken and red potatoes is that okay for you Fergal?"

"It's fine. Thank you for the dinner invitation."

"Not a problem." Lucas smiled up at him. "How about we get started on all this?"

"Well, have fun lads. I'll ring down when dinner is done."

Lucas took a deep breath before standing up. He knew Fergal was going to be an amazing looking man under his clothing. He just wasn't quite expecting him to be this amazing. Chiseled abs. Perfect pecs. The ass. Thick muscular thighs. How was he going to teach this man to dance for other men when he just wanted Fergal for himself?


	3. Chapter 3

Fergal was seemingly natural at dancing, Lucas watched him and took a deep breath. The more he watched the more he was regretting his offer. Maybe he wasn't regretting it, just feeling guilty as to why he was so willing to teach him to dance in such an erotic way. Not that Fergal needed a lot of help. Lucas looked up at the wall before stepping up behind Fergal and moving with him. He looked in the mirrored wall at the two of them. He noticed Fergal shied away from the image. He took in a breath before instructing him without words. Lucas took a deep breath. This was either his best or worst idea. He backed away and watched Fergal use the ballet barre mounted on the wall for leverage. Lucas watched him pull himself up from the floor. He sat down on the floor in hopes of concealing himself, he didn't want Fergal to get the wrong idea as to why he was here. There was a certain level of mutual lust, but Fergal was so nice to Maggie and that's all Lucas ever wanted. Maggie deserved the world. He looked up at the picture of her on the wall and ran his hands down his face. She'd been through so much and all she wanted was Lucas to be happy, here he was holding himself back.

Fergal looked at Lucas laying out on the floor. He seemed so stressed. Fergal crawled on the floor to him and he smirked. Fergal hovered above Lucas. It was a terrible time to realize how attractive the British man was. There was an obvious mutual attraction. Fergal looked at Lucas's mouth. There was something arousing about the slight pout. He started to lean into the other man when he heard the intercom. Maggie's voice brought him out of his perverse little fantasy. Fergal remembered that Maggie existed. He remembered how wrong this all was. He got back up to his feet and went to change. He glanced up at the portrait on the wall. The very pregnant woman, he couldn't see her face but he felt like she would judge him at this very moment. He followed Lucas up to the dining room. Fergal looked at more family photos on the walls. One stood out. It was a small boy, thin, in swimming shorts with what Fergal assumed were his parents. He noticed Lucas looked away when he realized what picture he was looking at.

"So, after dinner I have to go to work, if you want to come give serving a try? We need a server tonight?"

"Alright, am I dressed well enough for it?"

"Yeah. Usually the boys were something they can unbutton a little. It's like a waitress trying to get tips, show a lil bit, and get more tips."

The dinner went well. There was a little bit of chit chat between Lucas and Maggie. Fergal had a bit of trouble figuring out if their relationship was built on love or money. They had the strangest conversation about Lucas's day job. She seemed overly concerned about his dancing. She mustn't have known about it when they got together. She seemed she wanted him to use his talents in a different way. Fergal saw her holding Lucas's hand. Maybe they were really in love. Maggie was beautiful even aged. Fergal couldn't get over how beautiful she was. She looked like Ann Margaret in a way, her hair was slightly more gray, eyes more green. He looked down at his plate. He hoped that they chalked it up to the nerves of meeting new people. He followed Lucas to the door and started walking.

"Hey, where ya going?"

"Um to the bar?"

"Okay, me too, get in the car."

Fergal looked at the black Jetta. He inhaled before opening the door. Lucas smiled at him from the driver's seat. Fergal looked at his face. He'd taken the glasses he was wearing off. Fergal concentrated on him potentially needing them to drive. Seemed silly but it was the only thing that held his concentration. It helped him to forget that he was in this car with this married man he was lusting after. He'd had this whole thing with Maggie in his head. She must've met him, probably after a wealthy husband died. That's usually how those things are. She saw this handsome student probably, and kind of just hit it off. Dance was probably something they had in common. He could ask about dance?

"So, how long have ya been dancing? Like in general?"

"I went to school on a dance scholarship."

"mmm. So, is that something ya got in common with Maggie?"

"Of course. Dance. Sylvia Plath. Love of Tiffany lamps." Lucas smiled. "And cats. We have two."

"I'm more of a dog guy."

"Well, I mean, I would prefer a dog but she told me no multiple times. One day I'll just bring a Yorkie home and what can she do? I pay most of the bills."

"How does she feel about the dancing thing?" Fergal watched Lucas's face change.

"Not to be rude, but that's not something I really want to get into right now. I know we're getting to know each other but it's too personal."

"I'm sorry."

"Ya didn't know. Not many people do."

"Well, I shouldn't nosy like that. It's something my mother is still always chastising me about."

"Really, if mine knew how I approached you in the club, she'd slap the back of my head."

The two men laughed as they went into the bar. Lucas watched Fergal walk over to fill out some employment paperwork. He could hear Maggie telling him to make himself happy. He had fears. He didn't want to be hurt again. He had so many questions, like what if Fergal didn't want him because of his job? Just because he wanted to be a go go boy didn't mean he wanted to date one? What if he didn't want to be public about a relationship? Hell, what if he didn't want a relationship? Lucas watched him serving. Everything came so natural. The way he unbuttoned just enough shirt to show off his amazing pecs. The way he flirted with the men ordering. He was impressive. Lucas needed to stop staring at him. He walked to the changing area to get ready to dance as a way to remove himself from Fergal. He needed to keep his lust secret, at least at work, even if it reminded him too much of his last relationship.

Fergal was pleased with how his night was going. He was already close to a hundred in tips and he still had a few hours of work to go. He noticed the dancers for the night were in their positions. He watched Lucas for a couple seconds before the other server Rami walked up to him.

"So, I see you got your eye on Lucas."

"Huh? No." He shook his head.

"Cute. He's been through a lot and it'd be nice to see him happy."

"He seemed pretty happy with Maggie."

"Well, of course! That's different though."

Before Fergal could ask anymore he was being called to one of his tables. He looked back up at Lucas dancing on the bar. He walked passed him to grab an order. Lucas looked down and winked at him. Almost in a flirtatious way. Surely he was just trying to get more tips from the older gentleman shoving fives into his tiny little blue and red trunks. He felt like Lucas had been watching him and dancing for him. He sighed and went back to his job. He didn't want to look too deep into anything. Chances are he was just trying to get his spectators to think his eyes were wandering.


	4. Chapter 4

For the next few weeks it'd become routine for Fergal to eat dinner with Lucas and Maggie, then ride with Lucas to the bar. Lucas seemed to be extra flirtatious during their car ride. Fergal chalked it up to his natural personality coming out more. They'd gotten to know each other pretty well but Fergal still hadn't really asked about his relationship with Maggie. He was curious about it but the only thing he really knew about her was that she was also from Sheppey and that she taught dance for a large part of her life. She was also some fairly well known dancer in Sheppey. Lucas seemed to glow when she talked about her life. Maybe he was trying to cover up the deep sadness she seemed to have when she'd talk about coming to New Orleans and buying this particular home. Fergal looked at the side of Lucas's face, he looked like he wanted to ask him something.

"So, there's an event at the college for faculty next month, don't feel obligated but would ya be my plus 1? Figured since you were interested in teaching, ya'd get a feel for what the college is like?"

"Alright. Let me know the details."

"I'll let you know when I get them."

"Sounds good. See ya tomorrow?"

"Of course. Oh wait don't walk away from the car. How much Irish mythology do you know?"

"Enough I suppose? Why?"

"Finn Balor." Lucas smiled. "Kind of shows the duality of a man. One side of you is a hero and the other side is a demon. It was the best of my three ideas."

"Fair. Well, tell Maggie I said hello."

"Will do. Oh not to stack too much on you, but she's having a cocktail party Saturday, trying to um, well, she's having a cocktail party and she wanted me to let you know."

"I have off, so I'll be there." Fergal smiled before walking away.

Lucas drove home. He walked in to a quiet, dark house. He realized that he only knew Fergal for maybe a month, but he was attached. He knew he was walking on a dangerously thin line. The last person to walk into the bar that he fell in lust with hurt him mentally, emotionally, and physically. He didn't want it to ever happen again. It couldn't happen if he never acted on his feelings, if he pretended he had no emotional attachment to Fergal, he could never get hurt. He walked down a hallway in the house and stopped to look at one of the pictures. It was a wedding photo, the couple looked so happy. He wanted the same thing but he was too busy telling himself everything wrong with pursuing it.

The next morning came too fast. He gathered his things for work. He turned to Maggie in the doorway. She looked concerned. She was always concerned when he'd come in at three only to leave at eight. She looked up at his face. Her soft hand caressed his cheek. It was something she hadn't done in years. He missed it. Her smile was one he hadn't seen in years but there was still a sadness behind it.

"Why are you doing this to yourself?"

"Well, I know ya hate it but I enjoy dancing. You're still dancing."

"I'm not talking about dancing Lucas." She smiled.

"Look, I'm running late, can we talk about that later."

"I just want you happy."

"I am happy. Okay? I'm perfectly content."

"I've known you twenty-nine years. I know when you're lying. Have a good day at work."

"I love ya."

"I'll never not love you."

He smiled at the older woman before walking out the door. He had twenty-four hours to figure out the mess he got himself into. It had been a long time since he cried in his car on the drive to work. He just wanted some strand of happiness. He wasn't sure why he lied to Maggie. Maybe part of him didn't want her to think he was going to leave her alone. He pulled his phone out of his pocket. He stared down at it for a few minutes. Debating his next move. He wasn't too sure if there was anyone that could help him.

 **Lucas** : I have a problem and I need to talk to someone.

 **Rami** : Fergal?

 **Lucas** : How'd you know?

 **Rami** : Lucky guess.

On the other side of town, Fergal was looking at a real apartment. The realtor was flirty. She hadn't picked up on his lack of interest. She was still casually touching him and giggling when she'd talk about certain aspects of the one bedroom apartment. For a brief second he imagined that him and Lucas were living here. Completely stupid thought. He looked at the large bedroom. Just this image of him and Lucas sharing this space. He didn't know where these thoughts were coming from. Maybe it was the time he spent with him. They worked and lived the same schedule. Maybe he was getting too close to Lucas. After his appointment he left the apartment. He needed to start thinking about furniture. He had all these overwhelming feelings. He sat down at a small coffee shop across from a ginger haired man.

"This is so overwhelming."

"No I understand. It was really hard when Kevin and I moved here. I can't imagine moving alone."

"I've done it before, I went to Japan for a little. It was so impulsive but there was a cute boy I was chasing."

"Hey, there's a cute boy here you're chasing that I'm positive you could catch is you stopped running."

"This again."

"This always. There's chemistry."

"I don't want to read too deep into anything."

"No I get it. Just the boys are talking. It's been a while since we saw him smile as much as he's been. I can't get into detail but he's been through a lot. He really seems to be happier with you around."

"I don't know. I don't want to get my signals mixed up."

"Again, I understand. I didn't think Kev was even the slightest bit gay. He was working on a building next to the office I was working at and one day he just asked me to dinner, you know, as bros. Here we are fourteen years later married."

Fergal nodded. He was invited to the cocktail party. Maybe he just wanted Fergal there to look at? No he had Maggie. All of Fergal's thoughts kept coming back to her and her relationship with Lucas. He wasn't sure who he was trying to convince that he didn't have feelings for Lucas. They'd gotten to know each other so deeply. There were things he didn't know about Lucas. Lucas always avoided talking about his family. He'd talk about Maggie. He talked a lot about her. That was probably why all of Fergal's thoughts went to her all the time when he thought about talking to Lucas. Maybe he should have been a little outright in asking Lucas about his relationship with Maggie?


	5. Chapter 5

Saturday had been a day that Fergal was dreading. What if Lucas was dressed well at this event? What if he stared a little too long? What if Maggie noticed? He stood staring at the full-length mirror in his hotel room. He hoped this would be the last time he'd have to use this room. He hoped his decline of the realtor's advances didn't hinder his moving. He looked at his clothing choice dark gray slacks, white button up, and a matching jacket. Maybe the Vans sneakers on his feet were entirely wrong. No, he'd be fine. He wasn't going to this party to impress anyone. It was a cocktail party that his co-worker and his co-workers sugar mama were hosting. He gathered up his wallet and phone to leave. He wasn't going to miss living in a hotel room, aside from the free breakfast and maid service. He left the room and left the hotel to make the short walk to Lucas's. He looked at the house full of people. They were all dressed well. He saw Maggie. She was stunning in her red swing dress. It was very vintage. He stepped into the house and she greeted him with a kiss on his cheek.

"Lucas is in his office. He should be out soon."

"Alright. Ya look absolutely beautiful."

"Thank you. You look quite handsome yourself." She turned to an older man. "Oh, Roger this is Fergal, Lucas's friend."

"Oh lovely to meet you."

"Likewise."

Lucas walked out to the common area where everyone was socializing. He noticed Fergal in the dark gray suit. It accentuated things that he wasn't sure were meant to be accentuated. He felt underdressed in his khakis, burgundy cardigan, and white button up. He noticed Fergal smiling at him. He returned it and walked toward him. The glasses he wore did something for his face. They made him sexier. Fergal caught himself staring before he could form a sound.

"Hello."

"Nice of you to come."

"Of course. I've met some interesting people. Maggie's friend Roger is pretty entertaining."

"He is. He works down at the museum. He makes her happy."

The night went on and Lucas seemingly got more flirtatious. He was introducing Fergal to everyone. Fergal somewhere through the night realized that Lucas was holding his hand to drag him to differently circles of people. He wasn't sure why he hadn't said anything, why he left it happen, but he just went with it. He was positive that Maggie had to have noticed. He felt Lucas pulling him away from the crowd of people. He led him down the hall to his office. Fergal looked up slightly into Lucas's brown eyes. He watched his lips get closer. Lucas's hand wrapped around the back of Fergal's neck to hold him in place. Fergal's eyes shut when their lips met. He opened his mouth to give Lucas full access. There was a mutual exchange of moans. Fergal slid out of his jacket and Lucas started to unbutton the shirt he had on. Lucas moved his lips down Fergal's throat to his exposed chest. A moment of clarity hit when he saw the framed photo on Lucas's desk. It was Lucas and Maggie. His breathing got rough. He wanted this since the night the met but he couldn't.

"No."

"I'm sorry, I should've asked. I just, you kissed back, I assumed, I shouldn't have."

"No, no, it's not that I don't want this. I just. We can't. What about Maggie?"

"What about her? She's not going to come in. I locked the door." Lucas looked confused. "Aside from that, we're adults. It's not like I'm fifteen and giving a handsome neighbor boy a blow job in her gazebo."

"No, but it doesn't bother her that you do this?"

"No, she's been very accepting." Lucas took a step back from Fergal. "She's been very supportive since I came out. It was awkward being she had caught me with another boy's dick in my mouth but she was supportive nonetheless. She just told me not to tell my father I was sneaking out to be a little tart."

"Right."

Fergal nodded, how stupid could have been to think Maggie was anything but Lucas's mother. His drive to conceal his feelings always got the best of him. He looked up at Lucas and pulled him closer by his waistband. He started to undo the buttons on the cardigan Lucas was wearing. He untucked the button up shirt exposing the light blond hairs on Lucas's abs. Lucas went back in to Fergal's neck. He palmed Fergal's dick through his pants. Fergal swallowed.

"Stay here tonight?" He licked his lips.

"It's not going to make anything weird?"

"Like what?"

"Work? Maggie?"

"No. Neither. Mum told me to make myself happy." He gave Fergal a sly smirk.

"It's not going to lead to resentment?"

"No, I thought about this for a while. How I'd approach it. How I'd ask you. I see you so often in next to nothing but this suit. The lack of tie. I wanted some big romantic bullshit but then you walked in tonight and I just wanted to touch you. Taste you. Anything. Please."

"Right here, in the office, on this desk."

Lucas nodded and reached around Fergal into a drawer. He pulled out a black bottle of lube and a foil packet with a smirk. He was prepared. He finished unbuttoning Fergal's shirt and slid it down his toned arms. He started working on his pants. Fergal's eyes were transfixed on Lucas's hands. Lucas's mouth met Fergal's in a heated kiss, while his hand stroked Fergal's erection. He hissed at the extra pressure on the sensitive foreskin. Lucas removed his own shirt before dropping to his knees. He rested his forehead on Fergal's thigh. He was overwhelmed. He felt fingers in his hair.

"Hey. Hey. We don't have to do this." Fergal looked down at him just lying on his lap. "I don't want either of us regretting anything."

"I asked ya to stay. Now I can't go through with it." He heard Lucas crying. "I just get so close and then, this. If you want you can just leave. I'm sorry."

"I'm not leaving. Stand up." Fergal pulled Lucas against him. "As much as we both clearly have pent up sexual wants but we're not ready for this yet and that's okay. I like ya a lot Lucas and if keeping ya means waiting, I'll wait."

"I don't want you waiting forever." Lucas felt Fergal lift his chin.

"I'll wait as long as I need to." Fergal smiled. "Why don't we go to bed and if tomorrow ya still really want to do this, we do it. If not, I'll go home, change, and we can go to brunch."

"I'd like that a lot." Lucas looked at Fergal. "Not jumping to anything, but my last relationship, we never did anything in public. He didn't want anyone at the college to know. Or anyone anywhere."

"I'm not him. You're fucking beautiful. I want everyone to know. I've been wanting this moment since we met."

"Me too."

Lucas gave Fergal a chaste kiss and zipped his pants back up for him. He led him down the hall to his bedroom. They stripped down into their undershorts and crawled into the bed. Fergal watched Lucas's head move to his chest. His fingers naturally ran through Lucas's hair. It was peaceful. He didn't need anything more than this. He didn't want to say it was love, but there was definitely an exchange of feelings in this moment.


	6. Chapter 6

Fergal opened his eyes to the sun beating on him. He realized he wasn't waking up in his hotel room. He had a lean arm wrapped around his waist. He was comfortable. He could feel Lucas's content breathing on his back. It was something he hadn't had in a while. It had been a few years since he simply shared a bed with someone without there being some sexual act involved. He liked it. He liked the comfort he found in being held. While part of him wanted Lucas on a much more sexual level, he was content just like this. He felt a pair of lips on his bare shoulder. He turned to face Lucas. He pulled him into a kiss. His hands traveled over Lucas's chest. He pulled back and just stared at him. He noticed a couple small scars scattered on his chest. One by his lip. Little things that in a less intimate setting go unnoticed.

"Good morning."

"Good morning, Fergal."

Lucas was nervous, scared, anxious whatever the correct feeling was. He still wanted to fulfill every carnal desire he had the night before. The desires he had long thought he mentally prepared for. Every night watching Fergal at the club, seeing him in varying stages of undress, he thought he could handle being sexually active with him. Lucas was still afraid, he was afraid that after the sex, Fergal would walk away. The fears of Fergal regretting everything kept creeping into the forefront of his mind. He had all these questions he was afraid to ask him. Was this a relationship he wanted to be hidden? Was it something he could tell other people? Did anyone know he had the same feelings? He wondered a lot if the feelings were going to all end when they got to know each other deeper. Lucas had wondered when Fergal was going to walk away for a while. He was positive that Fergal would walk away once he realized Lucas was not the suave badass he pretended to be at the bar. He wasn't too sure this moment was real or if he was going to wake up to cold sheets next to him.

"Did ya sleep well?" Fergal smiled.

"I did. I'm not used to someone in the bed with me." Lucas licked his dry lips.

"Oh, but weren't you, um, I'm not sure what the word would be? Almost engaged?"

"mm Rami told you?" Fergal nodded. "He asked me to marry him but, I wasn't allowed to go to his house. He had rented an apartment for all of this, literally just had a bed, but it was so his wife who I didn't know existed, didn't know I existed. He refused to come here. He says it's because my father was rude to him. In hindsight, he had every right to be."

"Well, you're more than welcome to the hotel. I would prefer bringing ya to something a little more mine but for now we have that." Fergal traced Lucas cheek. "Brown eyes are terribly underrated."

Lucas could see Fergal's lips getting closer. He expected some quick kiss before Fergal ultimately said goodbye and left. The kiss was heated, but more sensual than sexual. The way Fergal's hands moved over Lucas's body felt more like he was studying every part of him. Fergal seemed more like he was trying to train his hands to learn every inch of Lucas than just feel him up. Lucas left his hands explore. He didn't know what this was like, it was all new to him. Someone wanting him the same way he wanted them was something he never thought he'd find. When they broke the kiss Lucas just stared, he wanted to say something but it was too soon. He felt Fergal shy into his chest. He wasn't sure if that was an invitation to say more, to confess any feelings, but he wasn't even sure they were in any kind of relationship for him to have these feelings.

"I enjoyed that kiss much more than the one we shared last night." Lucas's eyes shut at the confession.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. I'm not complaining. I'm just a sappy romantic." Fergal kissed Lucas's chest and smirked at the small shiver. He looked up with just his eyes. "I hope that's okay."

Lucas just nodded. He wasn't sure what he needed to confirm any of this in his head. His fears always prevented him from moving forward with anyone. He was used to having little one nighters he'd regret in the morning. This felt different. Everything about it was different. He didn't feel rushed. Part of him knew Fergal wasn't going to get up and get dressed to leave any time soon. He was content just laying with Lucas. Still, Lucas always thought the worst in every situation. He was conditioned to always think the worst. He eased back into laying with Fergal. He rolled to his so Fergal could lay on his chest. He thought about his mother always telling him to make himself happy. This seemed to be what she meant. He looked down at Fergal's eyes shutting. He was so peaceful. Lucas wondered if things would have been different if he had not broken down. If his crippling self-doubt and anxiety had not bested him, would Fergal have even still been here? He planned that little triste in the office for months, maybe it wasn't meant to happen that night? Fate was telling him not to ruin the relationship with sex or telling Fergal how much he was falling for him. He didn't even know what they were exactly. Friends? Lovers? Were they dating? He felt Fergal move when he left out a breath.

"Are ya okay, love?"

"Oh, yeah I was just thinking." He let out a breath. "Overthinking to be honest."

"About this here, right now? Us?"

"Yes. I feel like an idiot. What are we?" Lucas looked at Fergal. "Like if you introduced me to someone, how would you do it?"

"Well, just going by the degrees on your office wall, Dr. Lucas Eatwell?"

"No, like what else? Like you're introducing me to your mother?"

"Oh, well, Ma this is that really handsome professor I was telling you about Lucas. And she'd reply with mmm he's more handsome in person."

"Okay, well what about someone at like an office party?"

"I don't know, my partner? No, I don't like that. Maybe, my significant other? This hot professor I met, that for whatever reason actually enjoys my company?"

"Fair, I hope I'm not scaring you and like rushing into anything?"

"Not at all. Listen, I might take my clothing off for the pleasure of closeted businessmen for money, but I wouldn't have left you get as far as you did last night if I didn't want this, the emotional aspect."

"Is this something we can tell other people?"

Lucas looked scared. Somewhere the confident, almost arrogant stud Fergal met disappeared. He seemed replaced by this fearful, innocent, boy. There was so much fear in the way he asked if he could tell other people, Fergal was taken aback. He wasn't sure how to answer. He could tell his silence was making everything worse. He literally wanted everyone to know that he'd won some sort of relationship lottery and had this amazingly wonderful prize.

"Yes."


	7. Chapter 7

Lucas had been feeling amazing. Everything in his life the past few weeks had been near perfect. He was someone's something but something was off today, he knew he shouldn't have left little things bother him. Still he hadn't seen Fergal in a few hours. Usually they went to work together but for whatever reason Fergal had gone somewhere alone. A few hours went by and Fergal still had not shown up to the bar. Lucas was starting to worry when he heard one of Fergal's signature songs. He looked up at the stage Fergal was on. He looked different. He had on body paint, some intricate detailing on it. Lucas wasn't entirely sure what it all meant. He watched him dancing for a bit before their eyes locked. Fergal licked his lips in a suggestive way. More than likely to impress the handful of men giving him money. Lucas felt someone standing next to him. He looked at the ginger haired man. They exchanged a smirk.

"Hello Rami."

"Lucas. He trying something new?"

"I guess. It's working."

"You like it?"

"Not complaining."

Rami smirked at Lucas, before excusing himself to serve one of his tables. Lucas concentrated on the paints details. He's not sure who did the work, he could have guessed it was one of the other dancers, or he hired someone to come in. Either way he was impressed by how it outlined his muscle definition. The person paid close attention to details, the paint was flawless on his body. He watched him climb off the stage and walk toward the back. He looked around before following. He wasn't sure what he was going to say to him. He wasn't sure if whatever he was going to say would cause an argument. He took a deep breath before entering the locker room. He took a deep breath before entering the private showering room where Fergal was. If he concentrated on the breaths he'd get through this. He saw him standing nude. Only covered in the paint on his chest and thighs. His breathing changed. This was the most nude he's seen him, this close. Even when he attempted to rush into a sexual relationship, Fergal was still fully clothed. He hoped he didn't notice him off in the shadows.

Fergal could feel Lucas in the room with him. He smirked when he saw him trying to go unnoticed. He looked up in the mirror at him before doing anything. He turned to face him. His tongue slid out across his bottom lip. He was about to be bold but at the same time he was in need of help. He walked over to Lucas and started to straighten the button up he was wearing.

"I need you to help me in the shower. I can't reach all the paint." Fergal had a hint of sex in his voice.

"Alright." Lucas nodded.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Fine."

Lucas nodded and stripped down following behind Fergal. He was handed a washcloth and a bottle of Lush Dirty Springwash shower gel. He took a deep breath before stepping into the shower. He at times felt like this wasn't real. He doubted the fact that a man who looked like Fergal had any interest in him. Fergal knew him outside of work but still gave him attention. He still wanted to do things with him, spend time with him. Now he's here inviting him into the shower. He watched him wiping himself down getting majority of the paint off. He followed the silent instructions to wash Fergal's back. He did his best to avoid staring at Fergal's muscular ass. He didn't want to cross any lines. He was in the shower to help Fergal not stare at his ass. Fergal turned and shifted his eyes up. Lucas swallowed hard.

"Thanks." Fergal smirked.

"Of course." Lucas looked up at the shower. "The paint, that was interesting."

"Thought I would spice things up a little. Adam helped me out."

"Oh."

"Don't be jealous."

"I'm not."

"Luke, I can tell by your little pouty face that you're jealous."

"I mean, look at him…"

"Okay. And look at you. Those long legs, lean muscles, those chocolate eyes. Plus those sexy lips." Fergal pulled him closer and Lucas gasped. "I'm not trying to rush you into anything but I find you very sexy, especially when you're wet and jealous."

Lucas nodded and leaned down slightly into Fergal's mouth. The kiss was a heated invitation for more. Lucas's hand trailed down Fergal's chest. He smirked against Fergal's lips. He was satisfied with the sound Fergal made when he wrapped his hand around his erection. He was gentle until he started leaving a trail of bites. Fergal moaned when Lucas hot breath hit his nipple. Lucas backed them up into the wall. He dropped down to his knees in front of Fergal. He looked up and watched Fergal's eyes close. He moved his tongue along the underside of Fergal's hardened cock. He heard him hiss and smiled before taking the length into his mouth. He held Fergal in place by his thighs. He could feel Fergal pushing back to go deeper into his throat. He heard an aroused laugh as he continued.

"I. Fuck. You're. Going. To. Have. To. Back. Up." He let out a moan. "Cum."

Lucas increased the pressure of his mouth. He increased the pace. He could feel Fergal twitching. He looked up at Fergal with just his eyes. That seemed to have been enough for Fergal. He left out another moan before cumming hard into Lucas's mouth. Lucas sat back on his ankles and looked up from the floor. Fergal looked exhausted. Lucas looked pleased with himself.

Fergal looked down at him. Right now, was probably not the best time to blurt out all his feelings for Lucas. He was so sexy and Fergal was positive that a shower blow job was some sort of sign that Lucas loved him. At least, the fact that he was so eager to swallow Fergal's cum was a testament to something. He left out a breath before pulling Lucas up.

"That was fucking amazing."

"Well, that body paint was a big turn on." Lucas and Fergal's foreheads met. "I'm not trying to scare you off okay."

"You're not. Don't worry so much." He gave him a soft kiss.

"I wasn't finished. I know we've only been together a month, but even before that when I was getting to know you, I think I fell in love with you."

"Ya think? You're not sure?"

"No, I'm positive. I love you."

Fergal smirked. It was strange standing embraced, nude, in a shower at a strip club. Still it seemed like the perfect moment. Had it not been for the bar and some level of nudity, they were have never met. Fergal looked up at Lucas. He stroked his cheek and then nuzzled into his neck. Lucas heard him whispering how much and how long he waited to hear him say it. Lucas pulled back a little. He didn't want the night to end here, in a shitty shower. He licked his lips.

"Let's go home. I'm not done with you, Fergal."


	8. Chapter 8

Lucas was in a rush to get home. He debated things in his head. Fergal watched where he turned. He wasn't going in the direction of his house. The hand dancing on his upper thigh was a decision maker. Every now and again he'd feel a knuckle graze his cockhead. His mind was made. He was going to the hotel Fergal was still staying. He didn't give him much of a choice. He looked at him in the passenger seat. Fergal seemed a little embarrassed that he still hadn't found a real apartment.

"I know you're worried about me seeing wherever it is that you live, but I don't care. I just don't want my mother hearing if we get too loud."

"Alright."

Fergal led Lucas into the hotel. The night desk man smiled at him. He knew, of course he knew. He always asked Fergal why he never brought his handsome friend home. As they got closer to the room his mind raced. He took a deep breath before opening the door to his room. He watched Lucas walk in and look around. It wasn't anything like the home he lived in. He took a breath. Things were painfully quiet between the two men. Fergal walked over into his small kitchen area to see if he had any beer in the refrigerator.

Lucas looked at the bed he was standing in front of and shifted his eyes to Fergal. He started unbuttoning his shirt. he dropped it and then pulled his pants down. He walked over to Fergal in nothing but a pair of black briefs. He was flush with his back. His lips met Fergal's neck causing a moan. He worked Fergal's shirt off and spun him to face him. There was a lustful look that Fergal hadn't seen before. He drug his teeth down Fergal's shoulder over a large surgery scar. His tongue swirled around pert nipples. Their eyes met.

Fergal licked his lips before peppering Lucas's chest with small nips. He heard the aroused laugh that increased when his hand found Lucas's erection. He closed his eyes before he gently stroked Lucas. He'd waited so long to be this close and intimate. He wasn't sure how ready he was to do this. He wasn't sure his body could handle it. Just the feeling of being this close was enough. He drug Lucas over to the king size bed, pulling him down. He looked at Lucas hovering over him with intensity. There was a heated look in Lucas's brown eyes. He almost looked smug.

"Condom and lube top drawer in the night stand."

"Next to a fucking Bible Fergal?!" Fergal look up at him.

"What? You're literally about to commit like sixteen sins, in fact, I'm pretty sure you've already hit about 12?"

"Your hand was on my dick in the car."

"And your mouth was on mine in the shower of our mutual place of employment."

"It tasted amazing. Now, my little sin bin, I'm about to bury my dick in your ass."

"Who the fuck are ya and what happened to sweet little Lucas?"

"I have about four months of pent up sexual desires and I want to make sure all sixteen sins are covered. Stay on your back. How thin are the walls?"

"I assume they are pretty sound proof."

"Great."

Fergal watched a few things from the drawer hit the bed. Lucas walked back over and stood between Fergal's knees holding lube. He was sure Fergal had done this so no need really to use any toy to stretch him. He lubed up his fingers and started to finger Fergal's ass. The writhing and moaning he was doing went to Lucas's cock. He glanced down and realized what he was doing to him.

Lucas rolled the condom on and pulled Fergal down the bed. He gave him the same smirk as when the met. This time it meant a little more. Lucas lined himself up and pushed slowly. He hissed a little. He worked up a slow rhythm that Fergal seemed to enjoy. Lucas looked down at Fergal's face. His eyes lulled shut, making soft moans. He picked up the pace a little and heard Fergal moan louder. He felt Fergal's thick thighs pulling him closer. Their eyes locked at Lucas lowered his body against Fergal's. Their breathing was hard.

"You're. So. Beautiful. On. Your. Back. But. I'd. Love. To. See. Your. Ass. Up." He spoke in thrusts. "Now."

Fergal felt the coldness of Lucas removing himself from him. He turned to get on all fours. He didn't have to see Lucas's face to know he had that arrogant smirk. He felt more lube hit his ass, followed by a hard hand. There was an aroused laugh that followed before Lucas enter him again. He started to move his hips to match Lucas's rhythm. Lucas's moans got louder. Fergal's match. He could feel the bruising on his hips caused by Lucas's hands forcefully pulling him into his pelvis. Lucas moaned out Fergal's name before cumming. He collapsed down onto the bed and looked at Fergal.

"Was that okay?"

"Better than okay." Fergal looked at his own cum on his thigh. "Shower?"

"Give me a few minutes." Lucas looked into Fergal's eyes. "Everything is going to be okay between us right?"

"Of course. I um." Fergal took a breath. "I love you."

"Good." Lucas nodded. "I mean, like, I love you too, but like good that you love me."

Fergal laughed and pulled Lucas against him. He gave him an innocent kiss on the lips. He could feel Lucas smirking against his mouth. Their foreheads rested against each other's. Fergal noticed every time they were this close Lucas nervously licked his lips. He realized that all the confidence that he exuded dancing and in bed was a gimmick. Stripped down he was still a shy English professor. Fergal wasn't sure why he was still so nervous around him. He took a deep breath before kissing Lucas again. He knew he needed to be cautious and slow with certain things. He needed to remind Lucas that this was a deeper emotional connection.

"I'm going to go shower."

"Alright, let me grab my shorts and I'll be right in."

Lucas was more nervous now than before he made the irrational decision to take this step. This was always the part of the relationship where he was either told he was too much or not enough. He was too clingy or he was too needed. He wasn't there enough. He wasn't attractive enough. He closed his eyes in hopes the thoughts would just disappear. He grabbed his shorts still wondering what he was going to be faced with in the next coming weeks. He was preparing himself for the worst. He made sure he didn't look like he'd been crying before stepping into the bathroom.


End file.
